The Kat Eye View of the World - Kat Eye Studio

June 5, 2013 by Kat

Endings and Beginnings

The graduates have all walked. I’ve gone on my trip and returned. It’s back to the business of finishing up the school year for my son and getting ready for summer camps and family reunion trips and enjoying the summer.

But I find myself pondering a few deeper things with my return home on Monday. It turns out this was not just a trip to see my nephew graduate, like I thought. This was a trip to look at the cycle of life; of endings and beginnings.

Here he is, Logan the high school graduate. With honors, I might add. Eighteen years ago this month, he was born. As it is for any graduate, this milestone is an ending of the life he’s known up to now, and a beginning of the next phase. College. Adulthood. There is so much in store for him.

Eighteen years ago this year, a few months after Logan was born, my Dad passed away suddenly. My brother Ryan was a senior in high school at the time, ready to go through his own endings and beginnings. But his cycle, all of our family’s cycle, was abruptly changed and redefined. As we laid my father to rest in the shadow of the mountains he so loved, we marked the ending of his life as well as a new beginning. It was the beginning of life without Dad.

In a couple of months, Ryan and his wife Darcy are expecting their first child. A little girl, they are naming Suvi. Another beginning, a new life to celebrate and love. (That’s my brother in the middle, and Darcy on the right, as our family waits for Logan’s graduation to start.)

I hope, eighteen years from now, to be at Suvi’s graduation, celebrating the cycle once again.

I must admit, after this trip I find myself wondering what endings and beginnings are in store for us, in the meantime.

June 1, 2013 by Kat

Photo-Heart Connection: May

Shelter. That’s what I see here.

In the chilly spring mist and rain, there is shelter here. The branches reach down to encircle and protect what’s below. The soft grass cushions the ground. The magical light filters through, bathing the scene in an otherworldly glow. I can stay here and be protected.

Hello, trees, I whisper, I’ve missed you. For me, you are hard to see when you put on your leaves. But this reminds me that your strength is still there beneath the summer finery.

And in addition to strength, you now offer shelter. Perhaps I need to sit beneath you for a while, and take what you offer.

The coming of the leaves has left me without one of my favorite subjects… bare trees. Oh, I haven’t missed them terribly. I love the sunny weather and the new growth of spring, so I’ve found many new things to photograph. Just not the trees, not quite as much. So it was kind of a surprise that a hike in inclement weather turned my eye back to the trees, revealing this month’s heart connection. It is kind of a surprise to realize that shelter is exactly what I need right now, as I try to remain in the space between. Shelter from my own self, if I’m truly honest, as my Photo-Heart Connection practice enables me to be.

How about you? What’s your Photo-Heart Connection this month? Share it with us, and then visit your neighbors in the link up. The connection to each other is as important as the connection to the heart.

May 30, 2013 by Kat

Tis the Season

It is the season of beginnings, with new growth in a bright spring green. The season of glorious sunshine one day and pouring rain the next week.

And it’s the season of endings, as graduates finish up their schooling and move onto the next phase of life.

I’m off to Colorado today with my pink suitcase in tow, heading to attend my nephew’s high school graduation tomorrow and celebrations with my family over the weekend.

I’m a bit in shock that I have a nephew graduating. That my younger sister will have a kid in college next year. Oh my. So many of the people I know are well beyond this place, but it’s a threshold that, for my family, pushes my generation into a new phase of life. One with adult children and empty nests. I can’t quite wrap my head around it. I’m not ready for it.

But off I go… because it’s happening whether I’m ready or not. ‘Tis the season!

Oh, and don’t forget: The May Photo-Heart Connection link up will open on Saturday, June 1. That, at least, I am ready for!

May 29, 2013 by Kat

Low Tide

I don’t get out to the coast nearly often enough. I tell myself this every time I visit. Having grown up landlocked in Colorado, there is always this amazement that I can go to the ocean, to the edge of the continent, in an hour’s drive.

Last weekend was a very low tide, and I went out with other members of the PhotoArts Guild for a Friday morning trip. Up well before dawn, we met at 5am to head out in the drizzle. We were back before I needed to be at work. You can’t beat that!

While I took my big camera, I left it in the car and carried only my iPhone. I could always go back if I decided I wanted my dSLR. (I didn’t.)

I found myself mostly interested in curves. The curve of rock carved by time…

The pools of water…

The sweep of sand and sea (my favorite of the day)…

And the curve of the stranded, waiting for the tide to come back in…

These aren’t my usual subjects, but it was a fun morning, nonetheless. It was great to get out to a new place, with people who know where to go. Great to talk on the drive and get to know the other members better. Great to share online and see the other points of view, after the excursion.

Have you joined a local art or photography group or club or guild yet? You should. Don’t be intimidated – there is always room for one more. You never know where you might end up going, once you join in.

May 28, 2013 by Kat

Retraining the Brain

Did you have a nice weekend? I’ll hear that a lot today, getting back to work after a long weekend. I’ll probably ask it myself once or twice.

And how will I answer?

This morning, lying in bed the last few minutes before getting up, the thought floated through my head, I didn’t do anything yesterday.

Whoa. That caught me off guard. Because I did “do something” yesterday. I took a seven mile hike. Up a hill. In the rain.

Of course, afterward I spent the rest of the day in my comfy chair reading because I didn’t have the energy to do anything else. But I did hike seven miles, before sitting in that chair.

I can clearly see there is a part of me that doesn’t consider that “doing anything.” I didn’t accomplish something worthy; check something off of my “to do” list that I won’t need to do again. This probably explains why any sort of exercise has not been on my radar the last couple of years. Why I’ve been struggling to make time for these hikes. Because to my old mindset, I’m not accomplishing anything.

My sore muscles today tell me otherwise. My photographs tell me otherwise. I just need the message to get through to my head.

Making changes that affect ingrained belief systems, whether we want them lingering or not, is hard. It takes recognizing the thought patterns, and then changing them. I’m at the first step, the recognition of the damaging thoughts.

Whether my brain likes it or not, these hikes are here to stay. And I’ve discovered It’s not just my body that needs the conditioning. Apparently my brain needs retraining too.

May 27, 2013 by Kat

The Space Between

I have been struggling with my art. Yes, I’ve been playing and exploring, but struggling too. Learning something new is like that. The delight of new discovery. The wonder of the first, sometimes accidental, success. Then comes realization of intent. And with it the struggle to recreate what was first encountered by serendipitous accident.

For weeks, since creating this piece called “Looking Through,” I’ve been staring at it on my photo display. Trying to figure out what makes it resonate with me so much. How I can create other pieces with a similar feel.

It’s been a struggle. Lots of experimentation and failures. Many successful in their own way, but not the same as Looking Through. Finally, this weekend I created another that’s on the right track. I finally figured out one of the secret ingredients that had been eluding me — the space between.

The next day, as I was getting ready for yoga, I was wondering what I should do with myself. I had two days left in my holiday weekend, and no major plans. No classes to prepare for, since I’ve rescheduled to take the summer off. No big exhibitions to print and frame; I’m all ready for June. Newsletter written. No looming deadlines. My head started racing off onto new projects and new ideas. I started thinking of what I should do next, making plans. I suddenly stopped short, realizing…

For just a little while, I need to live in the space between.

What did I clear my schedule for this summer, if not to create space? Space for being, instead of doing. Space to take care of body and soul, instead of mind. Space to explore, and see what happens.

Even as I struggle to bring intentional openness into my art, I struggle to stay here, intentionally open, in my life, too. There must be something I need to learn here, in the space between.

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