Kat Eye Studio

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Days in Del Mar

Another week come and gone, five days in Del Mar went by in the blink of an eye. You think when you plan a business trip that you will have more time than you really do. But between early meetings and late dinners, there was very little free time. So much for taking advantage of staying near the beach! That’s why it’s called a “business trip” and not a vacation, I suppose.

I did get a couple of morning walks in on the foggy beach…

I had one beautiful evening…

And managed to get a quick stop in at the San Diego Museum of Art. A wonderful find there is the work of photographer Lalla Essaydi. These incredibly detailed, large format color prints were exquisite and intriguing in their subject matter. I encourage you to look her up and learn more.

Now I’m back home and getting back into the routine. Until Thursday, that is, when I’m off again. Stay tuned to find out where!

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Low Tide

I don’t get out to the coast nearly often enough. I tell myself this every time I visit. Having grown up landlocked in Colorado, there is always this amazement that I can go to the ocean, to the edge of the continent, in an hour’s drive.

Last weekend was a very low tide, and I went out with other members of the PhotoArts Guild for a Friday morning trip. Up well before dawn, we met at 5am to head out in the drizzle. We were back before I needed to be at work. You can’t beat that!

While I took my big camera, I left it in the car and carried only my iPhone. I could always go back if I decided I wanted my dSLR. (I didn’t.)

I found myself mostly interested in curves. The curve of rock carved by time…

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The pools of water…

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The sweep of sand and sea (my favorite of the day)…

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And the curve of the stranded, waiting for the tide to come back in…

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These aren’t my usual subjects, but it was a fun morning, nonetheless. It was great to get out to a new place, with people who know where to go. Great to talk on the drive and get to know the other members better. Great to share online and see the other points of view, after the excursion.

Have you joined a local art or photography group or club or guild yet? You should. Don’t be intimidated – there is always room for one more. You never know where you might end up going, once you join in.

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Watch and Learn

Last week at the dinner table, we had an interesting conversation. In my son Brandon’s sixth grade health class they are talking about setting goals. Trying to get the kids to look to the future, no doubt, and recognize that the decisions they make and the actions they take affect tomorrow. As part of his homework, he needed to interview his parents about setting goals. If they do; how they do it.

“I don’t need to ask you this question, Mom,” he says, “I already know you set goals.” I was taken aback. We’d not really talked about goals explicitly, how did he know? “Because you wanted to start Kat Eye Studio and you did it,” he answered.

I got a little jolt. Brandon had shown, all too clearly, how much he watches and learns from me.

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After that jolt, I got down to thinking about it, and realized he was right. I talk about my goals. I’ll tell my husband and son at the dinner table, the one time of day that we are usually all together, “I think I want to do this new thing…” and then I go work on it. Usually by the time I bring it up I’ve been thinking about it for a while and am a couple of steps on the path to get there, but I talk about it all the same. Sooner or later, my goal comes to pass as if it were meant to happen all along.

OK, that’s cool, I thought. Brandon’s learned about setting and achieving goals from me. But, what else is he learning from my actions? Scary thought.

This conversation reminded me he’s watching. He’s been watching, all along. He sees the good and the bad in what I do, probably more than any other person in the world other than my husband. He’s part of my inner circle, observing from the inside of daily life. It was one of those moments that made me step back and think about the example I’m setting. I felt my responsibility as a parent a bit more keenly than normal. It’s a reminder of the influence that we, as parents, have over our children. They are their own people with free will, but they learn much of how to navigate their lives by watching us. Not listening to us. Watching us. Yikes.

But we learn from them too, don’t we? He has always been the best conscience. If I tell him not to do something and he comes back with, “But YOU do that Mom!” I have to stop and take notice. Even if lately it’s layered with pre-teen attitude, I have to admit: He’s usually right. And I have to take a step back and rethink what I’m doing, too. It’s humbling.

Brandon just turned twelve a couple of weeks ago. Some days, it feels as if we have a long journey yet ahead of us, through the teen years. But recently I realized that if he leaves at 18, two-thirds of his time with us is past. We have six years left, and he’s not going to want to spend as much time with us as the previous twelve. Our influence is waning.

But… it’s still there. Every day I have the chance to be the example. It’s scary and exciting all at the same time. I didn’t know I signed up for this all those years ago when we decided to have a baby. I don’t think I’m a good enough person to be a parent. Probably few of us really are.

But one thing I’ve found: Being a parent is certainly making me a better person, every day.

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Focus on Strengths

If you choose to focus your attention on the strengths of others, on the virtues of others, on that part of others that strives for the highest, you run through your system the higher frequency currents of appreciation, acceptance and love.
— Gary Zukav in The Seat of the Soul

There it is again, the concept of focusing on the good. It popped up in my morning reading today, this time around seeing the good in others.

When we focus on what we perceive as faults, annoyances and shortcomings in others, that becomes all we see. It shapes our interactions. It sets up expectations. We look for the fulfillment of those expectations. Our perception of a person spirals down, down, down. One thing leads to another until our “reality” of that person is negative.

But look at it from the opposite perspective. If we focus on the strengths of others, we see things in a different light. We can look for things a person does well and that we appreciate. We can stop assuming motivations for actions. We can realize we don’t know another’s mind or intentions. Our “reality” of that person changes, because “reality” is subjective.

All it takes is a slight shift to one side.

Zukav goes on to say, “As you come to seek and see the virtues and strengths and nobilities of others, you begin to seek and see them in yourself also.”

Interesting concept, huh? We can’t forgive ourselves and sit in judgment of others at the same time. We can’t see the bad in others and expect to see the good in ourselves.

Don’t we all want to see ourselves in a good way? To see ourselves loving, caring and forgiving beings that want to move forward and grow? So many of us struggle to create a positive self-image. We see our faults and weaknesses and not our strengths.

Maybe we need to start by seeing the best in others, to see the best in ourselves.

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Strong Connections

As I write this, my husband is on his way to take his parents back to the airport after a for a one-week visit. Brandon is off getting ready for school, after a tearful goodbye. I expect more tears to follow. Goodbyes are always hard for him. They are hard for all of us, but they are always extra-hard on him.

It never fails to amaze me the depth of connection that my son has for his grandparents, and really all of the extended family, that he rarely sees. It’s as if there is an invisible tie that binds him to these people. There is some chemistry that makes him always feels safe and loved in their presence, unlike anyone else.

I must admit, I don’t quite understand it. I never had that kind of relationship with my extended family. I didn’t grow up with many of them around, similar to Brandon. Visiting them was always fun, but I didn’t know them well enough to form a strong attachment. Maybe that’s the difference between my son and me… It takes me time and effort to develop a deep relationship with someone, while he loves with his whole heart open from minute one. A good thing, I suppose. And a scary thing, to me.

So this morning I will provide the comfort and stability of a mother. Another relationship with those invisible ties that run deeper than I would have ever though possible, until having a child. The love that is a universal, unceasing presence, not like the the ocean that lies an hour away from us. There may be storms on the surface – frustrations and stresses of the day-to-day – but in its depths it is the same. It’s always there for us to visit, to tap into and gather strength from, when we need it.

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Leave Only Footprints

“Take only pictures, leave only footprints.” Haven’t we all heard this little saying about spending time in nature? But as I went through my pictures from Corvallis this weekend I thought of this in a new way… maybe that’s what we are doing in life. We leave only footprints in the lives of those around us. The pictures I take are only a visible reminder of the footprints my friends have made on my soul. Thanks to each and every one of you for the things you bring and the place you have in my life!

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